As children, we are full of questions; that is why we learn. And yet, as we enter school, the questions stop – almost as if there is an unwritten rule that asking questions is showing ignorance and therefore should be frowned upon. We become meek spectators – suppressing our innate curiosity, afraid to open our mouths. This then carries on even in the workplace – in meetings, questions only get asked by those up the hierarchy.
For much of my life, I was also like that – hesitating to ask questions and thus showing my lack of understanding. I started changing when I saw Abhishek ask questions as he was growing up. Sometimes, the way he asked the question would make me think even after I had answered him. I have in recent times started asking more questions: sometimes to others, at other times to myself.
Warren Berger writes: “A beautiful question is an ambitious yet actionable question that can begin to shift the way we perceive or think about something—and that might serve as a catalyst to bring about change.” He adds: “Questioning can spark change in your life, your business—in the world around you. I first began to understand this as I studied some of the world’s leading innovators; many of them are masters at the art and science of asking questions. They have a knack for looking at the world around them—at the existing reality that everyone else usually just accepts—and asking: What if we did this? Or tried that? Interestingly, we all start out as super-questioners—no one asks more questions than your average 4-year-old. But the habit of asking questions is trained out of us by the educational system. And then, as we make our way into the business world, we find that too often the emphasis is on short-term answers rather than exploring more far-reaching, potentially game-changing ideas. Many people in business are actually afraid to question the way things are done because they worry it will make them seem incompetent or insubordinate.”
What I find saddening at times is that in meetings it is all one-way information flow. One person is speaking or presenting, and others are meekly accepting what is being said. Each of them – a fully thinking person – has either switched off or is simply too embarrassed to ask. Questions spark discussion and debate, that drive new ideas. It is the questions that create better widgets. Yet, at least in the Indian education and corporate system, we tend to discourage questions. Each of us needs to change that. Because answers can only come if we ask the right questions.
At conferences, I make it a point to ask at least one question. By doing that, I get to introduce myself so everyone attending gets to know me. I can then also walk up to the speakers for a conversation knowing that there will be some familiarity because of my question. And sometimes, good questions can also be rewarding! I won an 1881 American Silver Dollar for asking the shortest question at a conference session.
We can only make our life, workplace and world better by searching for answers. But they all start with us asking beautiful questions.
