When I was living in graduate housing at Columbia University, a Russian roommate came up to me one day and said, “Rajesh, you have a very strong body odour. Consider wearing a vest and using deodorant.” I was momentarily taken aback – no one had told this ever in my life. And to this day, I am thankful that my roommate gave me that feedback – few would have the courage to tell another adult so candidly.
It was then I realised the importance of asking for feedback. It is not easy to ask and accept feedback. First, we are hesitant to ask because we do not like to hear negative things about ourselves. Second, we need to show sincerity in asking otherwise we will not get genuine and critical feedback. Third, we must have a commitment to take in the feedback and improve – also not easy because we have to accept our imperfections.
One of the questions I typically ask after a presentation to people who approach me is: what could I have done better? It is not an easy question to ask, because one then has to be prepared to receive critical (and at times, brutal) feedback. But that’s the only way to create a process of continuous improvement.
Recently, after I presentation, I asked the same question to a person who came up to me and complimented me. She was taken by surprise. At half my age (that’s the new world of entrepreneurs in India), she was shocked that I would ask her how I could do better. She then went on to give me some excellent feedback – you should have had more case studies, you should have explained some of the terms more clearly, and so on. And then she said, “You are the first person who has ever asked me for feedback on how to become better. It is such a good thing to do.” I replied, “Once we set aside ego and bring in the humility to learn, we can do so much more and do it so much better. That is the only way to improve.”
The change in my presentation style was also an outcome of me asking a friend for feedback after another “texty” slide deck. He said, “You have very good ideas, but the way you are communicating the story is not right. It leaves the audience bored and distracted. You have to grab them in the first 30 seconds and not leave their attention right till the end. Think how you can do that better.” And from there came a reinvention of my presentation style.
